Cat Boxing: Pirates, Zombies and Bears (Oh Shit!)

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So, several years ago there was this odd pirate trend that was going on, at least here in Portland, OR. There was even a store that opened up at the mall devoted to only pirate memorabilia and other nonsense… I thought it was lame.

After everybody got tired playing pirates, everybody jumped on the zombie trend… which was cute of course, but like any other trend, it was beat to the ground (which is a shame, because there is a really decent zombie counter-culture by several artist and writers out there and it’s fairly ruined for me… I was on a dating site (on still actually, but hope to not be it for much longer) and some of the questions people ask me is “How would you protect yourself during a zombie outbreak?” The clever answer would be “grab a few hi-ball glasses, and play some Xaiver Cugat records” (more of you hip-types with get that joke… notice I didn’t say hipsters.) Instead I say “There is no such thing as zombies, but I like to play shuffleboard.”

So, I was trying to guess the next trend (I think there was an alien one before all of those others) so it’s probably going to be cowboys, which would be something. However, I would like to think that the next big trend will be bears… not those big mammals that can rip you apart and look cute when they do it, but those huge hairy gay dudes… now that would be interesting… Spencer’s and Hot Topic will start selling leather straps and penis slings. And as with any other trend, I’m sure I’d just be as dull as ever and sit that one out.

Okay, I need to make some oatmeal and coffee… time for work.


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